Tag: 12 step

Title: Sobriety – Another Non-AA Path

Episode Overview

After a quick shoutout to a new listener in Bangladesh, Mike and Glenn dive into a candid conversation about the diverse paths to recovery. While AA works miraculously for many, this episode highlights that it isn’t the only way to get sober. 

They sit down with Dean Newcomb, a certified CCR recovery coach celebrating 18 years of sobriety, to discuss his unique, non-AA journey. Facing rural isolation and an unwelcoming initial meeting, Dean built his own customized program rooted in a direct, personal relationship with his higher power—bypassing the “middleman” of rigid religious expectations. 

Key Highlights & Takeaways

Religion vs. Spirituality: The discussion breaks down the vital distinction between man-made religious rules (the “purple robe people”) and cultivating a genuine relationship with a creator. Dean shares how finding God in nature, rather than a church basement, became the cornerstone of his early recovery.

The Shift from Pain to Fulfillment: Early sobriety is often driven by the immediate need to avoid pain and consequences. However, as Glenn, Mike, and Dean all note, long-term recovery is sustained by a desire for more out of life. Sobriety isn’t just about stopping the bad; it’s about actively filling the void with family, education, and genuine experiences.

Advice for the Newcomer: Dean outlines three actionable steps for anyone currently struggling:

1.      Get Honest: Completely admit to yourself that you have lost control. 

2.      Connect Higher: Begin building a relationship with your higher power.

3.      Speak Up: Ask for help. Even if you can’t get to a meeting, find just one person willing to listen to your story.

Guest Information

Dean is a certified CCR recovery coach and life coach specializing in helping people who need flexible recovery programs that fit into demanding lives. Listeners can connect with him and read his story on LinkedIn.  or at his website: 

Episode Overview David Dean Haskell, author of Wounded Angels, joins hosts Mike and Glenn at the Sober.Coffee shop (zooming in from Tokyo) for a deep discussion on sobriety, trauma, and moving beyond mere abstinence to achieve genuine emotional healing.

Key Discussion Points

• Beyond Abstinence to Inner Child Work: Putting down alcohol is the vital first step, but it is rarely the end of the journey. David shares how codependency and unresolved inner child wounds—rather than just the addiction itself—led him to seek deeper healing and ultimately write Wounded Angels for those asking, “Is this all there is?”
• Trauma Has No Standard Formula: The guys discuss how background doesn’t dictate addiction. While some endure chaotic childhoods without developing alcoholism, others—like Glenn, who rated his childhood a 9 out of 10—still succumb to the disease. Understanding personal trauma is about getting well.
• The “Why” vs. The Solution: When actively trying to get sober, obsessing over “why” can become a distraction. Glenn shared how years of overanalyzing kept him stuck until he accepted his alcoholism, embraced the 12 Steps, and prioritized a spiritual experience. However, once stable, examining root causes helps navigate life’s ongoing challenges.
• Working the Tools Through Life’s Storms: Recovery doesn’t stop life from throwing curveballs. Mike, Glenn, and David emphasize that regular inventories, processing trauma, and relying on spiritual grounding allow you to remain steady—and even thrive—amid the storms.
• Honesty in Medical Care: A critical point of agreement was rigorous honesty with healthcare professionals. The group highlights the dangers of mixing alcohol with medications, misdiagnoses stemming from hidden substance abuse, and the absolute necessity of medical supervision when adjusting prescriptions for depression or anxiety.

Core Takeaways & Closing Advice

• Total Sobriety Comes First: Nothing else works until the substance abuse stops.
• Holistic Balance: Long-term recovery requires daily attention to emotional, mental, physical, and spiritual health.
• Message to the Sober Curious: If you are in pain, don’t give up on yourself. Keep seeking answers, do the deeper work, and remember: it’s better to be better.

David Dean Haskell’s book, Wounded Angels, is available on Amazon.

Music has a profound ability to soothe the soul, soothe cravings, and anchor emotional sobriety. In this episode of Sober.Coffee, Mike and Glenn explore the soundtrack of their recovery journeys, breaking down 10 meaningful tracks that provided hope, perspective, and healing when moving from rock bottom to a renewed life.

Episode Playlist & Takeaways

• Song 1: Chicago – “I’ve Been Searching So Long” (Mike) Reflects the exhaustion of searching for peace in the wrong places and finally finding the answer in sobriety.
• Song 2: U2 – “40” (Glenn) The show’s official anthem. A reminder of being pulled out of the pit to sing a new song of hope and freedom.
• Song 3: Bad Company – “Ready for Love” (Mike) A rock anthem turned spiritual milestone—discovering how to love oneself, love others unconditionally, and love God.
• Song 4: The Cure – “Pictures of You” (Glenn) A tool for emotional sobriety. Making peace with old memories and photos from active addiction while cherishing the present clarity.
• Song 5: Elevation Worship – “The Blessing” (Mike) A spiritual, grounding track focused on stepping into a peaceful life and being a living blessing to those around you.
• Song 6: Matt Redman – “Better Is One Day” (Glenn) Centering the mind on spiritual connection: one day of clear, sober connection to a Higher Power outweighs thousands spent numb.
• Song 7 & 8: Jack’s Mannequin – “Swim” (Glenn) Perspective in hard times. No matter how deep or rough the waters get in recovery, the assignment is simple: just keep swimming.
• Song 9: Heart – “Love Alive” (Mike) A sonic reminder to keep love as the driving engine behind daily actions and recovery work.
• Song 10: Blue October – “Better Man” (Glenn) A stark, powerful look at the journey from hell to redemption—showing what it truly means to live every day as a better man.

Music bridges the gap between isolation and recovery. When words fail, melody and honest lyrics provide the stress relief, connection, and spiritual clarity needed to stay anchored one day at a time.

Episode Title: “AA Works 100% of the Time”

Hosts: Mike & Glenn

The Data Dilemma: Does AA Actually Work?

Hosts Mike and Glenn open the episode by tackling a common question: What percentage of people who go to Alcoholics Anonymous actually get sober?

They agree that because AA is an anonymous program lacking a formal structure for surveys or data collection, any statistic cited out there is essentially made up. There is no comprehensive, quantitative data set—only snippets.

However, the hosts argue that while the program’s overall statistics are impossible to track, the success rate for an individual who completely commits is absolute: When you surrender to the program, get a sponsor, take directives to heart, and stay active, AA works 100% of the time.

The “Secret Sauce” and Page 58

The hosts ground their argument in Page 58 of the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous, which famously states:

“Rarely have we seen a person fail who has thoroughly followed our path.”

When people follow the program and still relapse, Glenn suggests there is a “disconnect”—much like an ignored warning light in a car. Ignoring a low tire pressure light eventually leads to a blowout and a crash; in recovery, dishonesty is that warning light. Those who fail are usually those who cannot or will not completely give themselves to the program.

Exceptions: The Big Book notes exceptions for those with severe mental health issues. However, the hosts point out that diagnoses made while actively drinking can be skewed, and many ills are solved simply through abstinence and a competent recovery program.

Host Spotlight: Personal Journeys

• Glenn’s Story (The 10% Phase): Initially, Glenn tried doing AA his way, which resulted in a 10% success rate. He was a “yo-yo,” letting his ego and judgment keep him from truly connecting. When he finally surrendered—listening to others’ pain and finding similarities instead of differences—the program began to work.
• Mike’s Story (The Deep End): Mike found success by completely surrendering his own will from day one. He “drank the Kool-Aid,” jumped into the deep end, and embraced rigorous honesty, selfless behavior, and service. By letting others count on him, he achieved 100% sobriety.

Perception vs. Reality

• Celebrity Relapses: The hosts note that when a celebrity endorses AA and later relapses or dies, the world views it as an “AA failure.” In reality, it is an individual failure resulting from taking one’s will back or stopping being honest.
• The Gym Membership Analogy: Saying AA doesn’t work without doing the work is like buying a gym membership, never working out, and blaming the gym for you not getting fit.
• Dealing with “Bad Apples”: There may be people with bad intentions in the rooms, but meeting attendance shouldn’t be based on how you feel about others. The focus must remain on personal recovery and service.

Glenn’s Three Pillars of Proof

Glenn summarizes his belief in AA’s foolproof nature with three points:

1. Total Surrender: If you surrender 100%, it works 100%.
2. Living Proof: He sees it work 100% of the time for the hundreds of successful, active people he “does life” with.
3. The Promise: He adheres strictly to the Big Book’s promise that those who thoroughly follow the path rarely fail.

Closing Thoughts & Disclaimer

The hosts acknowledge that AA is not the only path—other solutions include alternative recovery programs, counseling, and church. For the “sober curious,” they recommend giving AA a try for 90 days or a year.

Special Medical Note: The medication Antabuse is briefly mentioned in this episode. Listeners are strongly advised to seek professional medical advice before taking any medications.

Conclusion: People may claim AA doesn’t work, but for Mike, Glenn, and the hundreds of active, accountable, and service-minded people around them, it is working 100% of the time.

Sober.Coffee Podcast Episode Summary

Episode Title: Healing Together
Hosts: Mike & Glenn

Episode Overview

If you think you can figure out alcoholism on your own, hosts Mike and Glenn have a blunt truth for you: in all their years of recovery, they have never seen that work successfully. Not once. In this powerful episode, Mike and Glenn break down the dangerous myth of the “Do-It-Yourself” recovery plan. As two natural DIY guys, they spent years trying to tackle their drinking problems alone, experiencing failed attempt after failed attempt. They share the hard-learned lesson that while you have to learn recovery individually, you simply cannot achieve lasting transformation by yourself. It truly takes a village.

From the life-threatening dangers of medical detox to the emotional minefield that remains after you put the bottle down, the hosts discuss why community is the ultimate key to breaking through life’s toughest challenges and finding a peaceful, purposeful way to live.

Key Takeaways & Mantras

• The Brain Trap: “It’s hard to fix a problem with the same brain that created it,” and “It’s hard to read the label on your own jar.” Ego tells us we can handle it, but self-reliance fails miserably when it comes to alcoholism.
• More Than Abstinence: Putting down the alcohol is just the first step. True recovery isn’t just about not drinking; it’s about learning a better way to live. Without the tools of Alcoholics Anonymous (AA), removing alcohol leaves a person completely exposed to their fears, resentments, shame, remorse, and self-hate.
• The Paradox of Service: Mike shares his shift from using people to get what he needed, to realizing that focusing on serving others brings back more than he could ever ask for. In recovery, you have to give it away to keep it. Living in a bubble does not support a life of service.
• Why AA Works: For those who claim AA doesn’t work, Mike and Glenn offer their own lives as living proof that it does. In a room of 10 or 12 people sharing, alcohol is just the admission ticket and the common thread—the real focus is on learning how to live a better life. When you live better, you naturally distance yourself from the need to drink.

The 9 Practices of a Healing Community

For anyone looking for true transformation, the hosts emphasize surrendering to a community of like-minded individuals. They share 9 vital inputs and practices that provide the necessary outside influence to heal:

1. Therapist – Professional guidance to unpack the past.
2. Church – Spiritual anchoring and fellowship.
3. Men’s / Spiritual Group – A safe space for deep, focused connection.
4. Sponsor – A guide who has walked the path before you.
5. Alcoholics Anonymous (AA) – The core program of action.
6. Readings – Daily literature to keep the mind centered.
7. Meditations – Grounding practices for emotional sobriety.
8. Sponsorship – Giving back by sponsoring and helping others.
9. Sober Community Involvement – Actively engaging with a sober network.

⚠️ An Urgent Note on Detoxing: The challenge of recovery starts with detoxing. Attempting to detox on your own without medical support can be strictly life-threatening. Always seek medical advice before abruptly abstaining from alcohol.

A Message to the Sober-Curious

If you are standing on the edge looking in, know that you do not have to live life alone. Find a sober program, find a therapist, plug into a church, and actively seek outside influence. Look for a community to be your lighthouse. When we work together, we heal together.

🎙️ Podcast Summary: Rapid Fire 2026 – Updated Espresso Shot

Hosts: Mike & Glenn

Listen/Connect: http://www.sober.coffee

In this fast-paced, high-energy “espresso shot” episode, Mike and Glenn sit down in the coffee shop to tackle some of the most common, burning questions in recovery. From the rules of sobriety dates to trading addictions and changing social circles, the hosts deliver raw, honest insights on what it truly takes to maintain a healthy recovery.

⏱️ Topic 1: The Importance of a Solid Sobriety Date

Alcoholics Anonymous is a program entirely rooted in honesty. Therefore, being rigorous about your sobriety date is just as vital as being honest about everything else.

• What counts? Any sip, tug, or swallow of a substance/pill constitutes a relapse. While it’s ultimately your program (“you do you”), coddling doesn’t work, and relapse can be fatal.
• The Comeback: If you slip, return with a genuine desire to fix the problem. Identify what went wrong, prioritize your recovery, and work to move the program’s information from your head down to your heart.

🍷 Topic 2: Is the Goal to Drink “Normally” or Never Drink Again?

The reality of recovery is that it is a forever program. While there may be initial resistance, true surrender leads to accepting that “forever” is the goal.

• The Reality Check: “We can’t drink normal because we are not normal.”
• Over time, that resistance fades into a deep appreciation for the clarity that sobriety brings. (Tip: Counselors and therapists can vastly help with this transition, but only if you are completely honest with them).

🔄 Topic 3: Trading Addictions (The “ISM”)

Addressing the habit of swapping one vice for another, Mike quotes their friend, Dr. John: “There is a hole in the soul, and we are constantly trying to fill that hole.”

• Slop vs. Spirituality: Filling the hole with “slop” (unhealthy habits) feels good in the moment but leaves you feeling bad overall. Filling it with spirituality—the purest insert—might feel uncomfortable or challenging at first, but it leaves you feeling good overall.
• The Key: Remember that it is an ISM, not a WASM (it’s an ongoing condition). Self-awareness is crucial. If a behavior is excessive, it’s likely unhealthy.

🎁 Topic 4: The Biggest Surprises in Sobriety

• Mike’s Surprise: The promise that the “fear of economic insecurity will leave us” came true. In active addiction, he chased money as a priority. In sobriety, making recovery the priority allows financial stability to naturally follow. “Keep coming back until the miracle happens.”
• Glenn’s Surprise: Glenn was gifted three superpowers: Sobriety, Spirituality, and Serving. He is constantly amazed at what recovery delivers, proving the old adage: “The more you give, the more you get.”

☁️ Topic 5: The Pink Cloud vs. Healthy Recovery

Mike defines the “Pink Cloud” as a state of temporary euphoria where someone doesn’t have their feet firmly planted on the ground or fully grasp reality.

• The Balance: Mike prefers a mix of both—reaching for the miracles that await while remaining grounded in the reality that life still happens.
• The Verdict: While the pink cloud is temporary, healthy recovery is permanent when you actively work a solid AA program.

👥 Topic 6: Will We Have to Change Friends?

Simply put: Yes. Today, protection of your sobriety comes first.

• Toxic people have no room in your sphere of influence.
• It is critical to be intentional about who you allow into your inner circle.

☕ The Final Verdict: Is It All Worth It?

The hosts wrap up the episode with an emphatic, resounding YES!

To anyone who is “sober curious,” Mike and Glenn offer a simple challenge: give sobriety a shot. Many in the program suggest giving it at least a year to see the full transformation. Ultimately, nobody ever regrets getting sober.

Podcast Summary: The Superpower of Forgiveness

Show: Sober.Coffee Podcast

Hosts: Mike and Glenn

Episode Title: The Superpower of Forgiveness

Executive Summary

In this deep and moving session, Mike and Glenn hunker down in the coffee shop to take a profound dive into the concept of forgiveness. Moving from the chaos of active addiction to the peace of sobriety, they explore a central, recurring message: forgiveness is a superpower. The hosts break down this superpower into three distinct dimensions: forgiving ourselves, asking forgiveness from others, and granting forgiveness to those who have wronged us. Ultimately, the episode serves as a roadmap for shedding the heavy baggage of shame, guilt, and resentment to achieve true freedom.

Key Themes & Discussion Points

• The Contrast of Active Addiction vs. Sobriety
  • Before sobriety, life was murky and blurry. There was no time spent “parked” on the reality of their actions.
  • The hosts recall having a “short wick” with absolutely no room for forgiving others.
  • Apologies during active drinking and drugging were either nonexistent or empty, weaponized to “use others to gain life.” As the saying goes: “Words without action is manipulation.”
• The Three Directions of Forgiveness
  • Forgiving Ourselves: How do we forgive ourselves for moments we will never get back, or the monumental damage done while focused on the drink? The hosts emphasize that letting go of this internal wreckage is vital.
  • Forgiving Others: Unforgiveness tears us up inside. Glenn notes that we must grant the same grace to others that has been graciously extended to us, living out the principle: “Forgive us our trespasses AS we forgive those who trespass against us.”
  • Seeking Forgiveness: Moving past a simple “I’m sorry” and transitioning into active amends.
• The Spiritual and Twelve-Step Connection
  • The Foundation: True forgiveness starts with the spiritual realization that we are already forgiven by our Creator, a truth supported by reassurance found in the Bible.
  • The Framework: Alcoholics Anonymous doesn’t just mess with your drinking; it messes with your living.
  • Steps 4 & 5 act as the essential unloading of resentments and map out the explicit need for forgiveness.
  • Steps 8 & 9 prove the power of forgiveness through action, bringing the undeserved gift of grace to fruition via real amends.
• Processing Deep Hurts & Protecting the Core
  • The hosts discuss varying levels of hurt (Levels 1, 2, and 3), noting that the deepest wounds often stem from childhood and formative years.
  • Hurt must be acknowledged and processed; forgiveness is a unique, highly individual journey that requires a personal action plan.
  • Being “Guarded”: Today, protection doesn’t mean isolation. It means intentionally surrounding oneself with a safe social core of people.

The Bottom Line

Resentments lead to a drink. Hanging onto unforgiveness has zero value.

True forgiveness requires us to be fearless, thorough, and willing to go deep. When we embrace the true definition of love—caring about another’s well-being more than our own—forgiveness eventually becomes instinctive. It is a transformational process that busts through barriers, lightens the load of shame and guilt, and ultimately delivers a better, more peaceful life.

Podcast Summary: “Unseeing Sobriety”

Show/Segment: Coffee with Paige Calentino

Hosts: Mike & Glenn (sober.coffee)

Guest: Paige Calentino – Sober Curious Coach and TikTok Creator

Episode Overview

Paige Calentino rejoins Mike and Glenn in the sober.coffee shop to dive deep into what has evolved from a personal recovery path into a shared life mission. For all three, sobriety required a total shift—a mandated “psychic change” and a 180-degree identity transformation. Today, they view their work not just as a job, but as life-saving service.

Key Discussion Points

1. The Coaching Framework & “Identity Expansion”

Paige utilizes a structured approach to help clients rewrite their relationship with alcohol, focusing heavily on shifting how they view themselves.

• The Entry Point: A 3-month coaching container designed as the foundation for a long-term relationship.
• The Process: Rewiring the brain through structured modules, education, journaling, self-discovery, real-world experiences, and targeted homework.
• The Goal: Moving from restriction to identity expansion—evolving into someone who simply does not want to drink, rather than someone who is fighting the urge.
• The Result: Discovering that we are capable, competent, and fully able to connect and survive without a substance.

2. Handling Slips and Relapses

• Instead of viewing relapses or slips as absolute failures, the team reframes them as valuable data.
• Slips provide direct insight into specific triggers and highlight the exact areas that still need emotional or behavioral work.
• A major focus of coaching is navigating changing social dynamics to protect and sustain sobriety.

3. Pathways to Sobriety: Modern Coaching vs. Traditional AA

• Paige’s coaching is presented as another vital option alongside programs like Alcoholics Anonymous (AA).
• The hosts note that while all programs have a process and many work, finding highly qualified coaches in a crowded marketplace is key.
• Mindful Drinking vs. Abstinence: While Paige works with clients who wish to explore mindful, moderate drinking, she and the hosts candidly share that they did not succeed at it personally. Total abstinence remains their chosen path.

4. Vulnerability and Growth

• Paige opens up about using her business growth to continue building her own identity.
• Putting herself out there publicly (including on TikTok) requires intense vulnerability. While it can be rough, she notes it is incredibly rewarding.

Final Thoughts & Core Takeaways

“Alcohol is the one thing that, if you take it away from your life, will transform that same life in positive ways.”

• Sobriety Wins: Taking alcohol away delivers a bigger, more positive life transformation than most people realize, opening the door to living life to the fullest.
• Start Small: Sobriety starts with simple awareness. You don’t have to commit to “forever” right away—though many choose to stay sober because of the gifts it brings.
• The “Unseeing” Effect: Once you become aware of what life looks like through the lens of sobriety, you can’t unsee it. Just give yourself the space to explore and take the first step.

Additional Resources Mentioned

• Free Online Community: Available through Paige’s website for anyone looking for peer support on their sober-curious journey. (www.paigecalentino.com)

Episode Title:

From Blackout to Belief: Unlocking the worlds best kept secret with Paige Calentino

Host / Guest Lineup:

• Hosts: Mike & Glenn
• Special Guest: Paige Calentino – Sober Curious Life Coach

Episode Summary:

Welcome back into the coffee shop! In this powerful episode, Mike and Glenn sit down with Paige Calentino, a sober curious life coach who shares her deeply relatable journey from a “work hard, play hard” weekend binge drinker to finding her true purpose in sobriety.

For years, Paige lived the fast-paced party lifestyle, but underneath the surface, a profound disconnect was growing. Her reality simply didn’t match the vision she had for her life. Feeling sick and tired, she initially tried righting the ship with 30-day and 90-day sober challenges. While these breaks made her feel better and helped her pick up the pieces through relational devastations, she found herself trapped in a cycle of trying to moderate or save drinking for “special occasions.” She quickly realized a frustrating truth: the more she tried to stop, the more she drank.

Everything changed on Christmas Day 2022. After drinking to a total blackout, Paige woke up overwhelmed by shame, remorse, and defeat. It was her turning point. Recognizing that moderation was an illusion, she chose a hard line of total abstinence and committed to an alcohol-free existence. Paige opens up about the grit it took to survive that tough first year, including how she intentionally secluded herself to protect her peace until she built up the confidence to navigate social settings.

Today, Paige has discovered what she calls “the world’s best-kept secret”—sobriety. By removing alcohol, her physical and mental health thrived, she rebuilt internal self-trust, formed healthier relationships, and unlocked the time to pursue her true passions.

Now, Paige is giving back. She shares how she guides other women through her highly successful, women-only coaching containers. Her 3-month program utilizes weekly one-on-one sessions, education, visualization, hypnosis, and daily journaling to externalize the “head stuff,” smash limiting beliefs, and get to the root “why” behind drinking.

Mike, Glenn, and Paige conclude the episode with a powerful reminder: who we do life with is just as important as doing life itself, and sometimes changing your people, places, and even your profession is exactly what is needed to change your life’s possibilities.

Key Takeaways & Highlights:

• The Trap of Moderation: How attempting to limit alcohol to special occasions often fuels the desire to drink more.
• Protecting Your Peace: The necessity of temporary seclusion in early sobriety to build social confidence.
• The Ultimate Secret: Sobriety isn’t about losing something; it’s about gaining internal self-trust, joy, and purpose.
• The Power of Coaching: Inside Paige’s women-only coaching framework, combining hypnosis, visualization, and journaling to overcome limiting beliefs.

To connect with Paige or learn more about her 3-month coaching programs, check out  paigecalentino.com . 
Keep coming back to the coffee shop!

“From Chaos to Calm” is a rapid-fire Q&A episode of the Sober.Coffee Podcast, where hosts Mike and Glenn break down seven foundational recovery phrases that help transition a life from a state of exhausting chaos into true calmness. [1, 2]

Below is a structured summary of their discussion, detailing the definitions, core mindsets, and key action steps for each recovery phrase.

☕ Episode Overview

• Hosts: Mike and Glenn.
• Setting: The Sober.Coffee shop.
• Format: Rapid-fire Q&A.
• Core Theme: Using traditional recovery wisdom as tools to move from chaos to calm. [1, 2]

🧩 Breakdown of the 7 Recovery Sayings

1. “Fake it till you make it”

• The Reality: Alcoholics Anonymous (AA) is ultimately a program of honesty.
• The Nuance: Sometimes, you must physically go through the motions of recovery until your mindset catches up with your actions.
• The Evolution: In active addiction, people act like chameleons; sobriety requires being entirely real.
• Better Alternatives: “Do it in spite of how you feel” or “Act as if.”

2. “Don’t drink and go to meetings”

• The Value: This is a cornerstone solution praised for its ultimate simplicity.
• The Mindset: It sounds so simple it almost borderlines on stupid, but it is the definitive answer to maintaining sobriety.
• The Outcome: Following these basic, explicit instructions is exactly where the “miracle” of recovery happens.

3. “Give it up to God”

• The Nuance: While surrender is vital, it cannot be passive.
• The Revision: The hosts add, “…and do something about it.”
• The Key: Combining spiritual surrender with proactive personal action.

4. “Do the next right thing”

• The Value: This serves as a foundational building block for daily sobriety.
• How to Know What’s Right: Lean on your support network by getting input from meetings and your sponsor. Accountability is crucial.
• 3 Action Steps:
  1. Go to meetings.
  2. Read the Big Book.
  3. Work the steps.
• The Early Sobriety Shortcut: If you cannot figure out what the next right thing is, simply identify and avoid the next wrong thing (e.g., don’t drink, don’t lie, don’t cheat, don’t act self-serving, and do what you say you will do).

5. “Your thoughts and feelings are valid. Act on them.” (Reversed by Hosts)

• The Trap: Relying strictly on your feelings can lead directly back to a drink, because wanting a drink may feel like a valid emotion.
• The Illusion: People chase the immediate euphoria of the first 30 seconds of a drink, a cycle many pursue for decades until it stops working.
• The Tool: “Replay the whole tape.” Remember exactly what happens after those first 30 seconds and where the drink ultimately leads.
• ⚠️ Critical Medical Note: Quick and abrupt alcohol cessation can cause severe medical conditions and can be fatal. Always seek professional medical advice before quitting cold turkey.

6. “One day at a time”

• The Value: A core pillar of the program. Dwelling on yesterday or obsessing over tomorrow offers no value.
• The Strategy: Process long-term future goals into bite-sized, actionable tasks for today. Working Steps 8 and 9 properly helps alleviate the emotional weight of past issues.
• Action Steps: Connect with recovery brothers and sisters. If a day feels too heavy, break it down to “one hour at a time.”
• The Secret: Living entirely in the moment. Most projected future anxieties never happen. Focus on providing value in the current hour.

7. “Living on the beam”

• The Metaphor: Life in recovery is like balancing on a tightrope beam.
• The Negative Side: Leaning toward restlessness, irritability, and discontent. (When you are off the beam, everything in life feels wrong).
• The Positive Side: Leaning toward honesty, humility, and service.
• The Practice: Use consistent self-awareness to regularly audit which side of the beam you are leaning toward.

📌 Summary Conclusion

In active addiction, individuals constantly feed off an exhausting cycle of chaos. By practicing and implementing these seven phrases, individuals can successfully ground themselves, shift their behavior, and discover lasting calm.