The guys discuss how you never use the first beak when pulling an accurate measurement, why you can’t expect 145 tons of black market chicken to be any cooler than room temperature, and when is the ONLY TIME you’ll ever hear a mourner say “we’re all better off”.
The guys discuss why choosing the correct prison activity can definitely change your sentence, how the lower your avocados hang the thicker your guacamole gets, and where your pizza literally comes out of the oven hot as lava.
The guys discuss how timing is everything when it comes to a pebble exchange, why there’s so much collateral damage with Damon’s misdirected wishes, and when is the appropriate time to report a pee-soaked neck pillow.
The guys discuss when it is most important to wake up early in Finland, why someone telling you how hot your mom was leads to and early 80’s Rampage, and how death metal was monumental in the 1880’s to detour men from hosiery and booze.
The guys discuss why it’s fiscally responsible to always know where your driveway is, what makes the first 60 seconds of a random Central Florida garage sale so dangerous, and when showing “kindness” to your neighbors can get you life in prison.
The guys discuss when a wafflestomp proves you did not cheat at Chinese Chess, how Canadians simply do not tolerate pretend witchcraft, and why having a mullet and an unpopular last name will get your bread an end cap display at your local grocer.
The guys discuss when 25 minutes means it’s time to drop the purse and start the car, how wood testosterone is 17% greater than ball testosterone, and why holiday eye contact is so imperative in avoiding wang fractures.
The guys discuss just how flammable paint CAN be on a Stanley mug, when stage diving CAN cost you a new pair of kicks, why being shot 27 times and getting hit with grenade shrapnel CAN still be better than being at home with the family.
The guys discuss why the new Grand Theft Auto will feature gospel music, how to play the odds of the dead jockey winning the race, and when a smoking corpse is the most expensive Uber.
The guys discuss how why when you go on vacation for 15 years your house gets demolished, how a man named Tony’s stories got completely omitted from a very popular book, and when a marketplace motherboard post is far more successful than Tinder.